If I could recommend only one book for the rest of my life, it may very well be The Philosopher and the Wolf by Mark Rowlands. It may not be the best book I’ve ever read, but after losing Pace, it was definitely the most impactful.
Have you ever heard the saying “time heals all wounds?”
Sure you have.
Some people attribute it to Chaucer, others to Menander. Ultimately, I’m not sure it matters, because it’s not true, at least not in the way you might think.
JFK’s mother knew this, when she said, “It has been said, ‘time heals all wounds.’ I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.”
I prefer Mark Rowlands assessment. “Time heals, but it does so through erasure.”
The right way to remember someone
It’s sad to think that the only way to be healed after loss is by eventually forgetting about it. That’s when I read section from The Philosopher and the Wolf:
Time heals, but it does so through erasure. This is true. I know it to be true. But it’s not complete.
Those we love. Those we lose. They all write a bit of themselves on our heart that makes us better. We remember them by becoming that person.
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